The Cats are Out

Voodoo

2009-12-15T23:52:00.005+08:00

Already Gone

Remember all the things we wanted
Now all our memories they're haunted
We were always meant to say goodbye

Even with our fists held high
It never would've worked out right
We were never meant for do or die

I didn't want us to burn out
I didn't come here to hold you, now I can't stop

I want you to know that it doesn't matter
Where we take this road someone's gotta go
And I want you to know you couldn't have loved me better
But I want you to move on so I'm already gone

Looking at you makes it harder
But I know that you'll find another
That doesn't always make you want to cry

Started with a perfect kiss then we could feel the poison set in
Perfect couldn't keep this love alive
You know that I love you so, I love you enough to let you go

I want you to know that it doesn't matter
Where we take this road someone's gotta go
And I want you to know you couldn't have loved me better
But I want you to move on so I'm already gone

I'm already gone, already gone
You can't make it feel right when you know that it's wrong
I'm already gone, already gone
There's no moving on so I'm already gone

Already gone, already gone, already gone
Already gone, already gone, already gone, yeah

Remember all the things we wanted
Now all our memories they're haunted
We were always meant to say goodbye

I want you to know that it doesn't matter
Where we take this road someone's gotta go
And I want you to know you couldn't have loved me better
But I want you to move on so I'm already gone

I'm already gone, already gone
You can't make it feel right when you know that it's wrong
I'm already gone, already gone
There's no moving on so I'm already gone

-Kelly Clarkson

This song is so me. So us.

15th Dec

Idaman

2009-12-14T13:20:00.005+08:00

BlackBerry Bold 9700

Everytime tengok rasa sesak nafas n sakit perut mcm butterflies dlm stomach beranak pinak little butterflies shaped like mini BBs with pretty wings curvy tails n bodacious black bods omg salivating.

14th Dec 2009

Another Useless Break...

2009-02-02T19:05:00.007+08:00

The 1week break has ended. And I've proven myself to be a huge lazybum yet again... It was supposed to be a productive week as I've got two 1500word practical reports for Pharmacology and Microbiology, a Biopharmacy class test coming up this Friday and another one of Microbiology next Wednesday, all of them untouched, and guess what I just found out a few minutes ago, my Foundation Pharmacy presentation which was scheduled to be in another 3weeks time has been changed to, of all the days God blesses us upon, TOMORROW! And I'm still at home now, still onlining and haven't packed a single thing yet, lazy lazy lazy to even get off from the chair! Sigh...

1 whole week! Wasted just like that... But I did shop for some new clothes. =D Hehe. And raya-ing at Xiao Yi's and few of my neighbours' houses. I do feel that this year's CNY is not that meriah as compared to the previous years though since Ayah has moved from a conventional bank to Islamic, so he'll be catering to only Muslim customers I guess, hence no more Angpows, no more boxes of oranges or hampers being delivered at home...and lesser open houses to attend. Hmmm... Okay I better get going. I hope this coming week will be better than what I'm projecting it to be.

Yeah dream on Farah.

Oh here's some pics from XY's open house. And no Xiao Yi I'm not gonna blog about you, yet. Haha. "She" cooked delicious spaghetti, some kind of sweet corn mixed with barley soup which was uber yummy, and she even baked some cookies too! I can't believe just how multitalented she is! =p

Nurzahirah Tarmizi

2009-02-28T22:52:00.006+08:00

Babyku tersayang, Happy 22nd Birthday!! It's sad that we can't celebrate it together... But here's something from all of us! =D

Cinta kau sepanjang hayat! Mwahhh!

p/s: Kitorang macam awkward kan? Rasa nak lempang diri masing2. Sumpah. Tanya Nad.
p/p/s: Oh and the video was Nad's idea. Dia dah terfikir nak buat since kat Jakarta. Hehe.

Pharmacology sucks.

2009-03-02T18:08:00.004+08:00

Thanks for the wonderful times we spent together...

See you soon! =D

Tiba-tiba

2009-03-03T21:49:00.007+08:00

I wanna touch, hold, hug and play with a lion cub (tiger cub juga boleh) NOW. Badly.

Nakkkk.......

Semut

2009-03-25T02:14:00.004+08:00

The exams are finally over. Blergh. Hopefully the results won't be as bad as I think they'll be. The first week of my semester break was really hectic, and rather depressing too. I don't really know why though. Perhaps it was because of my habit of doing everything at the very last minute, rushing here and there, stressed me out. And it certainly didn't help that I was scolded by a certain someone for that. Hmph. Oh I was also scolded cz I blew my savings on a pair of shoes and some shirts. Hey I starved myself for 'em okay! So back off!

Anyways, I went to visit my little cousins the other day. I can literally watch them aaall day and not get bored. They're just too cute! Heehee. Suka lah! =D Ok tiba2 ngantuk. Nak tido bye.

Wife Material?

2009-04-02T10:46:00.001+08:00

Somehow I felt insulted...

....

2009-04-05T11:34:00.001+08:00

Padan muka.

Wonderpets

2009-05-05T10:21:00.005+08:00

Yes I'm supposed to be in the lecture hall right now but since my housemates are still sleeping (except for Atun who's doing housewife-ish things) and the thought of enduring an hour with Mr. DC learning about the Royal Pharmaceutical Society of Great Britain, I'd rather stay home. =D Oh and by housemates, I meant my NEW housemates. Yes I've FINALLY moved out! Weeehoooo! My close friends would know how much I wanted to. And I'm so glad I did. I looooveeee the new house, and I loooveeeee my new housemates. Although I had to literally empty my bank account to settle everything down, I'm happy with it. =) I feel that the house is more home-y compared to the previous one, although it's not really as complete. But then I do miss Wani sometimes... I miss her coming to my room and I miss our pillow talk sessions. Oh well, at least we still have that every-thursday-we-must-do-something-crazy thing going on. Hehe. Ok I think that's it for now. Wanna go have my breakfast. Toodles.

Mortar and Pes-tle

2009-05-11T20:53:00.004+08:00

Today was the first time I got out of the lab later than 5 o'clock. The practical was on extemporaneous preparation where we had to prepare the Ichtammol cream and Kaolin suspension for kids. I've been looking forward to this particular practical as it marks the first time we actually get to prepare drugs, real ones, instead of just mixing, pipetting, titrating and playing around with useless chemicals. As exciting as it was, the part where we had to grind the Kaolin powder with raspberry syrup (oh I just found out today that the smell of most of the medicines we take when we were kids is actually the smell of the raspberry syrup) and chloroform water using the mortar and pestle was damn tiring! It's 10times the workload of making sambal belacan as we had to ensure all the solids are dissolved till they literally can't be seen at all. Okla maybe 5times. But the point here issss, preparing drug is not really an easy task. Apart from the tiresome mixing and diluting and grinding, we also have to make sure that the calculations are accurate so that the dosage is correct, refer to the reference books and cross check the prescriptions with the recommended dosages, make ammendments or suggestions where possible etc etc. And my first attempt today? not that good apparently. I poured water into the mortar first instead of into the calibrated amber bottle which was supposed to be the final step, making my Kaolin suspension a little bit diluted. Sigh.. Hopefully tomorrow's preparation of tablets and solutions would be better though. Aaand that I get to leave the lab earlier as usual. Hehehe.

I'm in love...

2009-05-14T02:03:00.008+08:00

Like seriously truly madly deeply in love with this guy. I've dreamt of him for three nights in a row now and I'm hoping tonight I will too. :D Goshh I love him I love him I love him I love him sooooooo much! I can literally spend hours and hoursjust looking at his pictures. Heck I think I'm obsessed! Hahahaha. Lee Donghae I love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu! Nah hamik kau gambar banyak2.

Damn funny la this one

2009-11-27T14:35:00.005+08:00

Wani asked me to look for this video on youtube n seeing how she lol-ed while describing it, I couldnt wait to watch it myself. It's the original version of the song "Right Round" now sang by Flo Rida but was sung by this 80's UK band Dead or Alive. Not the punk D.O.A though. Ni lain. Please watch the video guys. Sumpah lawak. From the disco ball, to the outfit, the hair n makeup, suara diorg, their choreography, memang complete ah. Macam tujuan video ni ialah untuk buat orang gelak. Oh lepastu paling lawak part the lead singer sways his butt mcm gamelan ke apa tah oh n everytime dia nyanyi I WANT YOUR LOOOOOOVEE jugak bahahahah takleh tahan dowh. But then maybe benda ni macam cool kot dulu. Tgklaaaaaaaaaaaa TENGOK!

P/s: Tadi tengok Travel & Living lepastu orang tu swim dgn dolphins taught them tricks n even kissed them ok sumpah jealous nak jugak!

27th Nov 2009

She & Him

2009-11-28T20:34:00.006+08:00

I seem to be youtube-ing a lot lately kan but I'm still recovering from the break up so I'm allowed to. =p Well anyways I've always been a fan of Zooey Deschanel (I hope I spelled (weh baru tau past tense of "spell" is "spelled" n not "spelt" haha) her name right). She's quirky and macam lalala camtu kan and we all know she can sing (like in Yes Man, 500 Days of Summer) but I didn't know she has a band! It's called She & Him and here's one of her music videos. This song is so cute and the video although macam disturbing sikit but it's sooo her lah. I love it. And I love her! Chekkidaut ya'll!

p/s: Bestnya kan falling in love, being in love... Sigh..

28th Nov 2009

You have been the one for me...

2009-11-24T17:54:00.001+08:00

Goodbye My Lover

Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.
So I took what's mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over but it won't stop there,
I am here for you if you'd only care.
You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.
I've kissed your lips and held your head.
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.
I know you well, I know your smell.
I've been addicted to you.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

I am a dreamer but when I wake,
You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take.
And as you move on, remember me,
Remember us and all we used to be
I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile.
I've watched you sleeping for a while.
I'd be the father of your child.
I'd spend a lifetime with you.
I know your fears and you know mine.
We've had our doubts but now we're fine,
And I love you, I swear that's true.
I cannot live without you.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

And I still hold your hand in mine.
In mine when I'm asleep.
And I will bear my soul in time,
When I'm kneeling at your feet.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.

-James Blunt

24th Nov 2009

I'm hungry!

2009-11-17T21:24:00.003+08:00

I just got off the phone with one of my besties. Her phone call kinda surprised me since I haven't been in contact with her for as long as I can remember. She was crying when she called but we had a good laugh in the end. Remember my post about how I wanna be selfish and all? Well her situation was pretty much the same as mine so consoling her was not really a difficult task. Among our conversations, we talked about how we all have our own lives now and how immature it is to be mad just because one doesn't have time for the other like how things used to be. Ok we have our own lives before but things have changed. Some of us are actually busy with studies, exams, thesis, some are pursuing jobs, some have family problems, some are dealing with all the relationship craps and the list goes on and on and on. But bear in mind that some of us prefer not to share these things, sometimes we just don't have the time to even do so. So when we went missing for a while, it doesn't mean we don't care. We do. And we miss you. It's just that there are other things going on in our lives that we have to prioritize. I think some of us really need to understand that and not go "merajuk" for all of a sudden just because we missed your phone calls or we don't text you as often as before. Please try to be more understanding and please think of other people's feelings too. If you terasa hati or whatever, tell us. There's no need to be harsh. We are best friends after all, aren't we?

Anyways, I terjumpa this clip on someone's blog and I think it is kinda cool. And funny too. It just shows how creative Asians are. Well atleast when it comes to this sorta thing. Haha.

17th Nov 2009

Esok class 10.30am Farah now dah 5am.

2009-11-16T04:43:00.007+08:00

I don't have any ex-boyfriends but how I wish I have one! Ughhhh! Benci my inferior, insecure, paranoid self.

*lempang muka sendiri*

Eh but seriously, anybody care to be my ex boyfriend? I'm not choosy. ;-)

16th Nov 2009

Esok class 10.30am.

2009-11-16T02:25:00.002+08:00

I'm on it! Hahaha sumpah takde kerja k. I actually google-ed "cool websites" and found this one. Damnit I'm boredddd! Arghhh perlu study Farah! Another weekend went to waste. Tsk tsk.

P/S: Ok siapa tah Greg Rutter ni? Malas nak google bye.

16th Nov 2009

Hold your own, know your name, and go your own way...

2009-11-14T15:44:00.007+08:00

Cute guys with guitars and mesmerizing, heavenly voices never fail to impress me. And here's two of them (both r my favs pulak tu) sharing a stage together. What more can I say, I'm in loveeee~ <3

14th Nov 2009

No?

2009-11-13T02:27:00.005+08:00

I’m 22 now and I still can’t refuse people’s requests or favours or whatever it is that they want from me. Sometimes I really, really don’t wanna do them yet I can’t bring myself to just say no. Perhaps it’s cz I don’t like to see their disappointed faces and somehow I think it’s cz I don’t want people to hate me too... I know that’s like so immature of me but I just can’t help it okay. Ughh. I wanna be brave! I wanna be selfish. And sometimes I wish I could just stop caring. But then again, I don’t think I'm capable of doing or being any of that...and I know that I won’t. Ever. ^*!&@!^#

13th Nov 2009

Not in a good state of mind

2009-10-15T21:45:00.002+08:00

Can I quit living life? Can I just die right this second? I don't even know what's the purpose of going on. I don't have the slightest passion on what I'm currently doing (I hate studying, I hate doing assignments, I hate memorizing all those stupid drugs, I don't go to classes, I don't know anything even after 2years of doing pharmacy. Ask me anything and I'd promise the blank stare that you're gonna get) I could literally sleep for 3days and nobody would even notice my absence, I don't have that much friends (I wanted to watch a movie a few days ago and I couldn't think of anyone else to ajak after the girls told me they're busy), I'm lame and a misfit, I don't know who I am, I can't define myself, I don't stick to my principles, heck I don't even know what they are! I My love life is going nowhere, I'm broke and in debt, I say things I didn't mean and hurt people everywhere I go, I waste my time envying other people's lives yet I do nothing with mine. I seriously don't know why God created me. I'm a useless piece of shit and I don't deserve to live.

15th October 2009

Only Human

2009-08-26T21:11:00.005+08:00

I know helping a friend is an obligation. Especially one that is in despair and is in terrible need. But why am I feeling so guilty? Ok it was wrong. What you did was terribly wrong. And I know that the whole helping a friend thing doesn't even remotely justify me helping you out. I thought long and hard before I made my decision. Heck I was even depressed over this for quite a while. But in the end, I chose to do what I always do. I chose to be your rock. With the hopes that you would repent, and not repeat the same mistake again. Also that you would get rid of that leech sucking every bit of you, though I knew that you definitely wouldn't. And after it was over, I expected you would cry, or show even a wee bit of remorse, but I could see neither of them. You seemed so cool, and all you could voice out was,

"Terima kasih lah cik Farah."

Ok firstly, I don't appreciate you thanking me nonchalantly like that. It's not like I want you to get down on your knees, bow to me three to four times like the Japanese always do, and cry your lungs out while thanking me. But atleast, show me your gratitude sincerely, prove to me that you regret what happened, and promise me this won't happen again. Secondly, I helped you. I was involved with what you just did. I now carry part of the sins you've committed. Ok, I know I might not be the model servant of His but my faith is still strong, and I am scared of Him. I am scared of what you did. And with you taking this as something that is of the norm, scares me even more. I haven't been able to sleep well these past few nights. I don't know whom to talk to. I can't talk to him since he won't understand how big this is for me, I can't talk to the girls since it is not my secret to tell and I certainly can't talk to my parents since I know they'd scold me for sure...

Oh God I'm so miserable right now. I just hope this feeling would go away soon. I'm tired of thinking about this all the time and feeling all guilty about it. And I'm scared too... Sigh...

26th August 2009

Saya takut dan risau...

2009-09-30T19:47:00.004+08:00

This morning i was awakened by Jihan's screaming and banging on my bedroom door. Turns out Carlos (my cat) was hit by a car, my neighbour's to be exact. I was kinda pissed and definitely sad too cz its like Lala's case all over again. I don't want Carlos to die like Lala but now it seems like he's really going to... =(

And then, this evening my dad called and informed me of the earthquake he felt and apparently, the earthquake hit Padang causing tremors in Malaysia. And there's the tsunami in US too.

Okay my concern now is, Penang is tomorrow. Why all the bad omens in one day? I'm kinda scared now and am thinking of canceling the beachside hotel and stay somewhere faarrr from the beach. I even thought of asking Ika to only drive 80km/h all the way there. Lantakla lambat sampai pun. I seriously hope all this paranoia will lead to nothing and we'd all be just fine... Amin... Oh and I hope Carlos will get better too...

30th September 2009

Yes I miss him.

2009-10-13T02:12:00.005+08:00

I was sorting out the pics in my laptop when I stumbled upon this one.

Don't know why this particular pic (an unflattering one at that) suddenly brings a rush of emotions and is causing me to miss him soooo bad I might just cry. =(

13th Oct 2009

30sen

2009-10-04T16:42:00.005+08:00

I wanna blog about Penang but sangatla malas so lets wait for Ira. =p

Oh and Alhamdulillah kitorang selamat pergi and balik.

Update: Ira dah blog! Click here.

4th October 2009